![\"Tulips\"](\"http:\/\/seedsproutblossom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/8333D305-10C8-444A-A76C-6B41329D700D-scaled-e1653000586459.jpeg\")
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Saturday is three months since returning from Mexico. My experience of time passing is both slow and sudden. I cannot believe it has already been three months and at the same time every day feels long and drawn out. It reminds me of how I felt the first year with a newborn.<\/p>\n
I have been putting off writing this post because I\u2019ve been struggling a lot in my body. Depending on when I sit down to write, I seem to be either morose and hopeless or excited and hopeful. Today feels more balanced leaning a little towards excited and hopeful. I have had days that feel so hard it breaks me and I sob. I\u2019ve had days where I\u2019ve written in my journal, \u201cthis was a fucking good day!\u201d Big swings. This is a boot camp training in Buddhist nonattachment.<\/p>\n
I am writing mostly to document the HSCT process and to be able to see changes over time. For that to be useful, I need to be honest and objective about my experience when it is my nature to write an optimistic, future forward, triumphant version of my experience. Well, the last couple of weeks have sucked. My spasticity is still rough. Often, I have periods of spasms so intense and painful that I can\u2019t think of or do anything else.<\/p>\n
Typically, in the morning, my right leg wants to go into \u201cextensor spasms\u201d where my leg muscles all push simultaneously to extended\/straighten my leg as far as it possibly can and with immense force. This hurts. It makes muscle fibers burn and I can\u2019t get it to stop. On the flipside, in the evening, my right leg goes into \u201cflexor spasms\u201d where the entire leg from hip, to knee, to ankle) flex upward suddenly and fiercely, like regimented marching, over and over. This also hurts and makes it next to impossible to do or be anything else.<\/p>\n
![\"MS](\"http:\/\/seedsproutblossom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/MS-Spasms.jpg\")
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I continue to experiment with different strains, delivery methods, and dosing of different cannabis products. I\u2019ve added more use of ibuprofen, a topical cannabis salve that is remarkable for pain, and topical Voltaren – also for pain. Sometimes I feel like I got it dialed in and then I\u2019ll try the same combination that it won\u2019t work at all. I keep a daily log on my phone to try and find patterns.<\/p>\n
![\"Cannabis](\"http:\/\/seedsproutblossom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/1A20F27F-3E80-4EEE-B2D1-697AEA8CFE66-scaled-e1653001121552.jpeg\")
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\u201cIf I take ibuprofen and half a gummy at 5 AM in the morning, does it make it easier to get out of bed?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIf I make sure to dose with cannabis every two and half hours, do I stay ahead of the spasticity train?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cIs ibuprofen and topical pain relief more effective?\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cDoes it work better if the cannabis is high CBG? High CBD? High THC? Half-and-half?\u201d<\/p>\n
It would probably be faster learning if I did this more scientifically, but I want to feel better fast, so I tend to throw things at it with well documented desperation.<\/p>\n
![\"Treatment](\"http:\/\/seedsproutblossom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/FF4F9733-5F2C-43BC-B237-B385DB231944-139x300.png\")
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I recently ordered a book on managing MS symptoms and found a passage in the spasticity section that outlines \u201cparoxysmal spasms\u201d and describes exactly what I\u2019m feeling. The physician author recommends an anticonvulsant medication, Tergretol. I met with my physician this morning and she has prescribed a similar medication for me, Oxcarbezine, to see if it makes a difference. In her experience this medication is equally as effective with less side effects. I will pick up this prescription this afternoon and get started. It can take up to two weeks to know if it is effective at all and if we need to do any dose changes before determining. Fingers crossed.<\/p>\n
![\"Book](\"http:\/\/seedsproutblossom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/C994547C-4012-472F-8785-18130E231CE2-169x300.jpeg\")
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Theme of The Month: Spasticity\/Spasm Management Saturday is three months since returning from Mexico. My experience of time passing is both slow and sudden. I cannot believe it has already been three months and at the same time every day feels long and drawn out. It reminds me of how I felt the first year … <\/p>\n![\"Cannabis](\"http:\/\/seedsproutblossom.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/2022\/05\/2ABC5718-617B-40F0-A537-0CFFEAE69EE4-scaled-e1653001416391-289x300.jpeg\")
Key Moments:<\/h4>\n
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